The agony...

Day two of not having a functioning laptop. I got a call from Toshiba, and they're sending me some parts, and I should get them tomorrow. And when I get them, I'm supposed to call and set up an appt for a guy to come out and fix it. I can't wait.

I've been reading a lot since my computer went down. I read all of Running with Scissors yesterday. Today I started Barrel Fever by David Sedaris. It's really good. I'm thinking that when I get my computer fixed, I'll keep it off for most of the afternoon so I can get stuff done.

So I don't get to see Steve this weekend. We've been really spoiled; I've seen him at least once a week ever since before Thanksgiving. So that sucks. And then next week I have two tests and a 15-minute presentation. I'm kind of embracing my sanity while I still have it; I expect it to be fully gone by Saturday.


My computer won't turn on. At all. It was working fine, and then I got in the car to come back to school, and when I got to school it wouldn't work. So I called Toshiba, and thankfully I have a good extended warranty. And this guy's going to call me tomorrow and set up an appointment time when he can fix my computer. I hope I don't have to wait until Friday--that's the day I'm the most free. I hope he can get out here like tomorrow afternoon or Tuesday or Wednesday or something.

So for now I'm stuck in the hellish computer lab. I have to listen to stupid people teach other stupid people about quadratic equations, and I have to deal with a computer with a crummy keyboard where the keys require an extra effort to depress. And I feel completely lost without my bookmarks folder.

This morning I bought four new books. I started reading Augusten Burroughs' Running with Scissors. I just finished Magicial Thinking by him and I really liked it. Since I didn't have a computer as a distraction, I read basically for 3 straight hours. I have about 65 pages left. This is what my life was like in 6th grade, just uninterrupted reading. I don't think I mind it. It takes my mind off of school.


Today I saw a website of a musical group comprising two 12-year-old girls (twins) who sing folk duet songs. Innocent enough, until you listen to the lyrics. Definitely all about white superiority. It was so bizarre; I couldn't stop looking around their website and interviews with them and their message board and stuff. Ugh, that kind of crap depresses me so much, that there are parents indoctrinating their children to believe such shit. Like that the Holocaust was a myth and everything. Blahhhhhh... This shatters my already-dubious faith in humanity. I can't get this off of my mind.

And the worst part is, they're terrible singers, they can't sing in tune, and they suck at playing their instruments.

Kirstin got a board game where you had to figure out how the cast members of Seinfeld would dance in certain situations. Like, "George is at an office party. He desperately wants a raise. Suddenly, Devo's 'Whip It' starts playing. How would George dance?" And then you have to demonstrate. Anyway so Kirstin and I were setting up and for some reason there were a few Guess Who boards, so we decided to play that too. But instead of the regular ones like Claire, Max, David, etc. there were new ones, and they were more "urban" like Tyrone and Latesha. And we didn't have the same people on the two boards, so that made it impossible to play.
And then I had to go in for a sleep study, but they gave me something that would make me vomit all night long. It was hellish; I could feel the vomit coming out my nose. And then it was all over and the tech was like, "Good, good, but we didn't get all of the necessary data, so you'll have to stay and do the same thing over tonight, as well."


I dropped photography for these reasons:
1) I'd always be late coming from orchestra
2) 5 hours of class in a row is a lot
3) I would always miss dinner
4) It cuts into valuable hwk time
5) I didn't buy any of the materials, I need them all today, and I don't feel like going out.


I skipped my first class today: Intro to Hinduism. I opted for a nap of the 2.5-hour variety. Ultimately a wise choice.

Dream I had during my nap:
I was at my house in Indiana, with the same next-door neighbors and everything. It turned out Gwen Stefani was eating dinner with the next-door neighbors. My dad went over and invited them all over for coffee. They came, and I invited Steve over [it should be noted that Steve is a real-life Gwen Stefani fan]. I told him to go introduce himself to Gwen, and I would get a picture of them. He said, “No, no, I couldn’t do that,” but I pushed him and finally he accepted me and thanked me for being understanding about that sort of thing. He was also crying a little. It turned out he was too shy to go up and talk to her [it should be noted that Steve is totally unlike this in real life]. Gwen Stefani was wearing a dumpy, shapeless green sweater and khakis. She was bored with our plebian existence, so she left shortly after she came.

Steve had a birthday in October. I ordered him a couple books, but I had them accidentally shipped to my dorm address from freshman year (because Amazon has that as my default address, cause one of the two us is stupid, and it’s not me). I went to Busey-Evans to see what would happen when they got the books, and the desk clerk told me that they would forward them to me right away. Steve’s birthday came and went, and I ended up buying the books again from B&N or something so that I would actually have something to give him. I couldn’t cancel the Amazon order because it had already shipped before I noticed the address problem, but I couldn’t send the books back for a refund because I didn’t have them in my possession. Anyway, all of this happened in October. Today I finally received the package with the books I bought Steve. Four months later. I hate the university.

Last Friday Steve and I went to the Grand Lux, my favorite restaurant. We had two loaves of complimentary bread. Then I ate a whole pizza; it was elliptical in shape, with the long part being about 12” and the short part being about 6”. Then we got the New Orleans beignets, which are heavenly. They’re like funnel cakes but spongier, and about the size of a billiard ball. Steve bet me I couldn’t eat 5. The terms of the bet were that when I won, he would have to do a naked lap around the Tribune building. I don’t know what I would have had to do had I not been able to eat 5. It should be noted that he was only able to eat 3 beignets, and then he was just too full. After my third, he told me to stop, because he didn’t want me to get sick. I kept right on going, and finished all 5. I had to sit for a few minutes and digest, but I didn’t get sick. After that, we had a little less than 30 minutes to make it between the Grand Lux (on Michigan and Ontario) and Union Station before our train left. And it’s about a 25-minute speedwalk. So we were speedwalking/jogging through several inches of snow, trying to make it back on time. But at least I didn’t lose my dinner.


I went back to the Ear, Nose, & Throat doctor today. I don't have cancer, thank goodness. We're going to treat my friggen huge tonsil like an infection. He has me on a lot of antibiotics. I have to take a bacterial supplement to repopulate all the little buggies in my intestines. I also have to take a prescription and an OTC antacid because the antibiotics give me heartburn. Oh well. I'm just glad that he gave me antibiotics in pill form. That liquid was terrible. It made me retch every time I took it. Anyway, I have to go back and see him in 4 weeks.


One factor that I noticed is common to most of my bad dreams/nightmares is a communal toilet. Like it's one room with several toilets and you have to just choose one and use it, and there are no doors and you can see everyone and everyone can see you. Ugh.

My poli sci TA looks a little bit like Ben Folds. But not in a cute way. He also is the kind of person who thinks that everything he says is just so incredibly funny and witty, and occasionally it is, but not always.

First hwk assignment: 5-page paper analyzing a newspaper article of my choosing.


Book count as of 1/19: 18. Blahhhhhhhhhh.


First day of classes. Consensus: meh. My photog instructor is going to bring his dogs to class, which will be interesting.

I took some Vicodin today because I had a variety of abdominal pain. Oh man, did I ever feel weird. I took it before my French lit class, and my corneas felt like they were detached from the rest of my eyes, and one person was controlling my corneas, and another was controlling my body. Freaky deaky. Then I came back from class and napped for like 3 hours. Whoops.



-to have stellar oral hygiene, and later, to whiten my teeth
-to take care of my skin so that it always looks youthful and vibrant
-to wake up at 7:45 every weekday
-to go to as many classes as possible
-to do as well in my classes as I know I can

What I did over my winter vacation...

First two weeks:
Work hard for the money. Oh yes. Ohhhh camp.

Second two weeks:
Doctors' appointments galore. Our final count: 14. IVs: 3, two in the left hand, one in the left arm. I'll just tell the interesting stuff. I have sleep apnea. Last Thursday I went to have my kidney stone lithotripsied. The doctors were pretty much jerks. (For some reason my doctor didn't perform the procedure.) I had to fast for 24 hours before this procedure. I was so hungry that night, but too weak to make myself anything. My mom and Steve came through for me; my mom by making Italian stir fry, and Steve by bringing me some awesome Wendy's.

Then on Saturday I went to have a biopsy of my lingual tonsil. Apparently it's really swollen, and it's blocking 90% of my airway, which is probably causing my sleep apnea. So I went in and they said they would have to put the breathing tube in while I was still awake. This idea scared the hell out of me, but it turned out that I was so sedated that I didn't know what the hell was going on; I don't remember it at all. Anyway, before that, they had to numb my trachea. They gave me a shot in the throat. That hurt so bad. I had to hold my breath, and they gave me a shot in the throat, and sprayed some stuff into my trachea. That made me cough so hard. While the needle was still in my throat. Guhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I have a small black and blue spot on my throat. I get the preliminary results of the biopsy back tomorrow (technically today), bright and early.

I'm on too many medications now (final count: 5). I had to order a medic alert bracelet; it should arrive by the end of this week. I have to get a CPAP machine. Hopefully mine will be less obtrusive than the one in the picture.