Last night I dreamt that I was dating Jimmy Fallon. Ew. That's...really gross. And the sad thing is, 5 years ago it wouldn't have been gross. Hell, three years ago it wouldn't have been gross. But Jimmy Fallon went the way of the gross and I don't forsee a return to normalcy anytime in the near future. So I offer a warning to Jimmy Fallon: don't date me.